How to Cope With Things That Make Us Angry
Anger can be a natural response, especially when you feel disrespected or ignored. It brings on strong, aggressive feelings that help you defend yourself. But if you find yourself angry really often or it’s affecting important parts of your life, you might want to talk with a counselor to learn to handle it better. Often, it’s the actions, or lack of them, by people around us that make us mad. Like when they …
That video of a cat riding the family dog across the living room is way too cute not to watch right now! The guy in front of you really should pull over, so he won’t miss a single precious second. And so he won’t miss the traffic light when it changes -- and, you know, hold up everyone behind him.
It’s not that hard -- cart returns are usually all over the parking lot. And if they aren’t, how long does it take to walk the cart back over to the curb -- 15 seconds? Apparently, that’s too much to ask of some people.
We’re all in a hurry. But someone should tell the lady on your tail that she isn’t going to make you go any faster -- and she’ll still get there after you. She’s also making an accident more likely, which would keep everyone on the road from getting home on time.
That must be a really clever text the guy’s writing as he walks down the sidewalk -- so clever that he needs to stop in his tracks to finish it. He’s way too absorbed to move off to the side so you don’t crash into him -- and spill your latte down the front of your white shirt.
They brought sodas, chips, and candy to help them enjoy a quiet weekend in nature. But then they left the cans and wrappers just where they finished with them. Untouched wilderness? Not anymore.
This guy’s had a long day at the office, and he deserves a little space to sit and relax -- why take one seat when you can have two, right? But lots of people are tired at the end of the day, and they all want a little space to relax on the subway. So move over, buddy!
You can hear the music blaring from two cars behind you. Give us all a break, guy, and just turn it down. You want to continue hearing into your old age, right? Too much loud music can take a toll on your ears.
You know, they’re those weird pictures of words and numbers in funny shapes and sizes you’re supposed to type to convince some website you’re not a computer. The problem is, half the time you can’t tell what the words are any better than a computer could, which sends you in an endless loop of new ones you can’t read. There’s got to be a better way.
That lady in front of you isn’t sure if she’s in the mood for a caramel macchiato, or a latte, or maybe she wants to really mix it up today with some green mint tea. She should take all the time she needs -- before she gets in line.
Seriously? No one wants to see that bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich in its various stages as she eats. And you definitely don’t want to listen to the sound she makes when she chews (smack smack). Mom was right when she said it’s rude to eat with your mouth open.
If he can’t wait for someone to finish a sentence before jumping in with his own thoughts, he’s not really having a conversation, he’s giving a lecture. If he tried listening for a change, he might learn something.
Traffic is backed up. The light’s turned yellow, and someone drifts into the middle of the intersection in the hope that it’ll clear and he won’t have to wait through another light. But it doesn’t, and now his wishful thinking is keeping you and the 700 cars behind you at a standstill.
You just bought a gorgeous new vase at the flea market that you’re pretty sure is a genuine Ming Dynasty knockoff. It looks perfect on the sideboard in your living room -- except you can’t seem to get the price tag ($8.95) peeled off the side. Water, dish soap, razor blades -- nothing seems to work. What the heck did they use to stick that on there?
Not the ones that you write at home and stick in the mail to pay your bills -- those are fine. No, the checks we’re talking about are the ones it takes the guy in front of you 10 minutes to write out at the grocery store’s “fast checkout” line, with you and 15 others in line behind him. Seriously, people were using debit cards in the last century.
People handle anger in three ways: expressing, suppressing, and calming. The healthiest way to express it is to make yourself heard in an assertive (not aggressive) way without hurting anyone else. You also can try to calm, or control, your anger -- count to 10, take deep breaths, and let the emotion go away. But don’t suppress, or hide, it. That can turn those negative feelings inward and lead to high blood pressure or depression.
A few tips to control your feelings: Use humor to defuse the situation; focus on the solution instead of the problem; and don’t say the first thing that pops into your head -- listen and think first. Your doctor can do some tests to see if your emotions are running too high. But if you have a problem with anger, you probably already know it.