Showing posts from July 3, 2016

How to Face Your Fears

Fear vs. Phobia Fear protects you from danger. Phobias have little to do with danger. More than 19 million Americans have a phobia -- an intense, irrational fear when they face a certain situation, activity, or object. With a phobia, you may know your anxiety and fear are not warranted, but you can't help the feelings. And they can be so intense they virtually paralyze you. See what makes some people afraid in the slides ahead. The Three Kinds of Phobia Hundreds of different phobias have been identified, including phobophobia or fear of phobias. But when talking about phobias, which are a kind of anxiety disorder, experts divide them into three categories -- agoraphobia, an intense anxiety in public places where an escape might be difficult; social phobia, a fear and avoidance of social situations; and specific phobia, an irrational fear of specific objects or situations. Agoraphobia: Fear of Public Places The agora was a market and meeting place in ancient Greece.

21 Ways to “Give Good No”

By   Christine Carter Saying “no” can be really hard. But   Christine Carter   has a three-step plan to get there. We are coming to that time of the year that is both blessed and cursed with zillions of invitations. Here are some that are in my email right now: Can you meet me for coffee to help me with my book proposal? Will you bring a snack to the 8th grade party on December 19th? Are you coming to our housewarming party? Can you help with my son’s college applications? Do you want to take the kids to see “The Nutcracker” this year? As much as I’d like to do all of these things, I can’t. When I take on everything that comes my way, I find that I start staying up late in order to get everything done. And then, tired, I start pressing snooze instead of meditating in the morning. Before I know it, I’m too tired to exercise, too, something that is essential for my wellbeing. It’s a slippery slope that starts with me taking care of other people’s needs at the expense of my

Why Self-Compassion Trumps Self-Esteem

By   Kristin Neff Researcher   Kristin Neff   reveals the benefits of going easy on yourself: less anxiety, less conflict, and more peace of mind. In this incredibly competitive society of ours, how many of us truly feel good about ourselves? I remember once, as a freshman in college, after spending hours getting ready for a big party, I complained to my boyfriend that my hair, makeup, and outfit were woefully inadequate. He tried to reassure me by saying, “Don’t worry, you look fine.” Juan Estey “ Fine ? Oh great, I always wanted to look   fine   . . .” The desire to feel special is understandable. The problem is that by definition it’s impossible for   everyone   to be above average at the same time. Although there are some ways in which we excel, there is always someone smarter, prettier, more successful. How do we cope with this? Not very well. To see ourselves positively, we tend to inflate our own egos and put others down so that we can feel good in comparison.